5.27.2009

Did you steal my puppy linocut and stickers?


Well, did you? Did you steal my puppy (linocut) and prints and some paper? You didn't touch my toolbox so I know it was on purpose. Those prints were made with puppy love and I wish you well in life because bandits only get one thing at the end of the day: a one-way ticket to HELL. 

So isn't funny to delve into the psyche of hipsters to figure out why they name their bands after zany things? Bowerbirds isn't such a strange name but it ain't no Beach Boys let. me. tell. you. that! Actually, I am so fascinated by bowerbirds. The real ones, not the funky fresh band. Let me tell you for a moment about bowerbirds (I took ornithology in high school so technically I can tell you anything about birds). They are NUTS. They are incredibly meticulous (euphemism for avian obsessive compulsive disorder) and they are always cleaning their area of the forest and organizing their belongings. They do this for a few reasons: one is because they are anal retentive beyond belief and the other is to attract a mate! That is so romantic. They find the most beautiful blue objects they can carry with their hollow boned frames. They make crazy nests (bowers) and use them as architectural wing-men to help display their treasures. Before you are wooed, ladies, let me just tell you something. This one male bowerbird has been known to mate with up to 53 lady bowerbirds. He gets around. An important lesson to be learned: just because he has a beautiful bower and copious blue treasures does NOT mean he made them specifically for you! In other words, correlation does not imply causation. Let me just tell you that. Below is Sir David Attenborough in one of my favorite clips. What a genius, what a voice.

Bowerbirds produced a very cohesive album, Upper Air, which I believe has not yet been released but has leaked all over the place and now here you find it. It follows their freshman release Hymns for a Dark Horse, and they gained troops after touring with Phosphorescent, naturally. If Grizzly Bear, Devendra Banhart, and The Wood Brothers all got together maybe it would sounds like this but probably more like Phosphorescent and Bon Iver who are on the same label as Bowerbirds, Dead Oceans. This label has a monopoly on hip and now sound: Akron/Family, These Are Powers, White Hinterland, Dirty Projectors and the aforementioned. I'll go ahead and say that Canada needs to stop pumping out kickin groovy bands before they take over the entire indie scene which is not capitalistic. At all. 



P.S. This blog is becoming more and more of a burden for people who do not want to learn about animals and selfishly only want to reap the benefits of my music taste. Well, the two can no longer be mutually exclusive. Not when people keep naming their bands after dinosaurs and birds. (BOTH REPTILES INCIDENTALLY!)

5.26.2009

Dinosaurs. They're so cool. BUT DEAD.


I typed "rare dinosaurs" into google today not realizing that because dinosaurs are extinct they are all quite rare. Well sometimes it takes a little forgetting in order to remember. Here is most helpful site on the world wide web: http://www.search4dinosaurs.com/
It does exactly what is says: helps you search for those dinosaurs you so desperately want to know more about! Ankylosaurus is like a dwarf kitten: just a dinosaur with ankles and feet! Dimetrodon is one of the monsters they battled on Power Rangers. Giganotosaurus was big. Iguanodon, Gorgosaurus, Seismosaurus, Albertosaurus, and my favorite, Giraffatitan are all hilarious dinosaur names. (dinosaurjungle.com and typesofdinosaurs.com are also good resources for this kind of scholarly research).
In my never ending quest for dinosaurs I cannot help but listen to Pterodactyl whilst I browse. Straight offa Brah Records they released their second album, Worldwide, this year and I do believe it to be a smashing success. Here is a video to a sweet song they wrote! I am really into "December" because even though it's almost June this song is on my new mix cd in my car which plays when I drive places. Side note: 45 miles of hills+fixed gear bike=jello legs. J-E-L-L-O...my legs are alive! Back to the matter at hand: Pterodactyl is not just a sweet dinosaur but a sweet band as well! They have gotten some poor reviews which are typically prefaced by a comparison to Oneida but HEY, nyc is a free country so I can still like them and e'ry body knows GANGSTER LEGS has the final say on what is hipshitcool. And, my friends, and they are dashing young men from Brooklyn, city of the Gods. Done and done. 



Download "December" 

5.24.2009

I heard he made a robot in sculpture class!


Rock Dove stands alone proudly, with an American flag waving majestically in the distance as the sun sets upon their rosy cheeks. Front man Hank May's voice and lyrical prowess emits the kind of depression-laced sanguinity that the youth of our nation is clamoring for in these dark, dark days. Are they a more relatable version of The National, Bill Callahan or Nick Cave? Or, perhaps the boy gang from Los Angeles doesn't need to be compared at all. 
I am wowed with every aspect of this band. Other sites have written about Mr. May, saying how impressive it is that he is a genius at the age of 19 or however old he is but the fact remains that, regardless of the age, Rock Dove's new releases are shining and golden and you might want to spend a moment to revel in all their glory. Check Rock Dove before they blow up, musically, and it's all over. 

Nat King Cole singing Merry Christmas to You? No, just brilliant.




Hank May covers one of the greatest band's (Polaris) greatest songs. You remember The Adventures of Pete & Pete, right?

P.S. If you pray really, really hard, maybe Rock Dove will fly over the amber waves of grain and purple mountain majesties to New York City and play a show on the East coast. It couldn't hurt. 

5.21.2009

Too many tea tree toothpicks.

Writing a paper on the gentrification of New York street art seemed like a good idea yesterday. Now I feel like huffing spray paint is a better one. 

i know the video is creepy but the song is good.

5.19.2009

The Best Summer of 2009

So here we are the place we have reached here it is: the end. Of the school year. For normal people May means nothing. For me it means I don't have to think about finance for 3 months. For normal people it means they still have to think about finances for...forever. Wait, what? Grown-ups are so confusing! 

Are you ready for this (ready for this) doo doo doo DOODOO DOO DOO doo doo DOO DOO doo DOO (jock jams lyrics).

No but for real, the imagery in this moment of wonder could not compliment the audio content any better. The transition between frames? Breathtaking. As the tempo changes I see less misty mountaintops and more sensual beaches. I feel uncomfortable, but, oh wait! There are some seagulls; now I feel okay.

I feel like this is the best time to tell everyone: Adventure music is my favorite genre and I live in a realm of fantasy. Check out that alpaca!

5.16.2009

what?


THIS IZ SO CREEPY! IZ HE CRAZY? BRILLIANT? BOTH?

AHHH!

Download My Darlin' by Eminem. (yeah, that's right)

5.15.2009

Crystal Clear Clarity


Low blow, man. Let me make something clear to my gargantuan fan base: I am not a spider leg ripper offer. I don't go in for that. The guilt of murdering a pregnant opossum must be a heavy burden, but the fact that you  broke a kitten's leg out of anger is inexcusable.

JK & Co "Crystal Ball"
This song is from 1968's Suddenly One Summer. This song is ridiculous and also instrumental. 

The Crystal Method "The Slipstream"
Whooooa. Summer jamz for u. Some electronapop!

Dan Deacon "Crystal Cat"

5.14.2009

Malicious Lies


It has come to my attention that my good name is being slandered. While I never expected this muckraking from a person so close to my very own stone-cold heart, it happens that a very dear and personal friend of mine has been spreading malicious and upsetting lies about me. Now, I will disclose, I did have an unfortunate run in with an ill-wandering (fully grown!) nighttime creature and my large, undiscerning vehicle. BUT, if I had any whatsoever opportunity to avoid this tragedy I would have, by all means, done so. I consequently give my deepest condolences to the possum community at large for this unfortunate, yet unavoidable, incident.

Now, to turn to the perpetrator....

I would just like to point out to the blogosphere that the certain lady who has so horribly wronged me also happens to be the same girl who, just a few months ago, after a few too many Genny's, pounced upon some unsuspecting, innocent Daddy Long Leg spiders, held them dangling 6 feet in the air and ripped one or two of their legs off. Now please readers, hold back your gasps of horror. I know that seeing this horrific side of the lady you normally know as a kitty-loving, baby-hamster-facebook-wall-posting, pet-dog-video-making, "cute animal lover," but I feel like it's my duty to get this out in the open. Now I already know what said woman will retort with: "Genny made me do it" or "Beth, you're dumb, spiders are not fuzzy, nor cute, nor especially photogenic in little outfits." But to that I say, NAY. If you, dear miss, cared AT ALL about the animal kingdom you would hold all of it's members with equal standing and respect.

Just sayin'.

Win One For The Gipper

This is Fergus

This is Geronimo


Together, they form Fergus & Geronimo
They have a song called Tell It (In My Ear)
The song might be the best song EVER
Judging by their pictures, Fergus & Geronimo clearly mean business


In your face Emileee

5.12.2009

All my friends are dead. UPDATE: BETH KILLED A BABY POSSUM



Feeling sad about stuff? So were these gentlemen. But for a change of pace (and yes, I own this next album and it hangs proudly on my wall for all to see) is Keith Green's Song for the Shepherd. No one is happier than Mr. Green to be clutching that little lamb and no one is feeling more trapped by Green's clutches than that little lamb.

The saddest thing besides the deafening of the radio is the loss of real life albums that you can hug and above are 3 instances of PROOF. Bring back the collector's joy in life. In the mean time, let's all give in and realize that the radio will never be cool again and iPods our really really convenient. Music videos are still sort of relevant because of youtube.com and it is neat because not even VH1 plays "Robot" by the Tornadoes but thanks to the INTERNET we can all see what freaking genius concept this 1963 video was.


5.11.2009

Covers: Yay, nay?


Alot of people hate covers. Alot of people also really hate Florence & the Machine. I don't understand either of these groups of assholes. Yeah, covers suck alot of the time, but SOMETIMES they're awesome! And Florence and the Machine is an insanely adorable girl with a voice that sounds like it should be coming out of a tugboat rather than a little British woman in 50s housewife dresses. Some of the little wavers she does are seriously poignant and, dare I say, heart-tugging/tear-jerking. So ya'll, stop being so mean and check out these dope covers!

Download Florence and the Machine's covers of Postcards From Italy (Beirut) and Hospital Beds (Cold War Kids).

Way Back, When I Had The Red And Black Lumberjack

This may or may not be my last gangsterlegs post, but probably.  As I leave y'all forever, I wanted to leave a few more things.  I have tried to put together the quintessential leaving montage songs.  ENJOYYY


5.10.2009

Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death


Honestly, who wouldn't want to die from pleasure?  Anyways, Death by Pleasure is a new duo from Italy.  One guy plays drums and a sampler, while the other plays guitar and sings.  These days it seems the two person band is the way to go.



Now for a real treat.  This video and song comes from the 1979 all female punk band the Mo-dettes.  Enjoy!!


I love you, Mom.



Don't forget to call your mom. 
I saw the movie Earth yesterday. James Earl Jones  told me that the lynx is the very essence of wilderness. Pardon? Then he took me on a tour of baby animals being chased and caught by wolves and cheetahs. The worst one was a slow motion train wreck of some gangly legged antelope or something that face planted and skidded across the ground until a cheetah came up and tore its throat open. Happy Mother's Day. It came full circle with the fucking polar bears whose dad had to die of starvation while the walruses just watched an gurgled in their own blubber and misery. I think that Jones had a message for me: I am lucky to have been born  and I am very important to the planet because I am a child of nature and if I don't stop polluting my dad won't get that walrus pup he needs to survive and he will close his eyes and I think that means he is dead. Disney will never fail to kill my parents. 
Here is the cutest blog ever. http://letsbefriends.blogspot.com/  It is only of pictures of different animal species being friends. I am going to use Microsoft Paint (the highest of low art forms) and craft a Mother's Day card out of maybe the pony one because it's cute and I bet my mom loves cute just like me.  That is a cute and tiny kitty. 

Here are some songs about Mom.

This song is the very essence of a mother's omniscience. 

Bill Callahan is one of my favorite musicians for feeling stuff. Like emotions.

Pop music about the women in our lives. I am not sure what else this is besides a simple and pleasant popindiepop song.

Woody Guthrie  "Needle Sing"
Catching me a sweetheart, needle sing. Momma don't you hear my needle sing? Man, I love Woody. Grasshopper, green snake, hold my hand.

Bad Brains!!!!! WHATTTTTT????!!!!


Do you remember when the Beastie Boys were called the Young Aborigines?  Well neither do I.  The Beastie Boys you have grown to love, were actually Bad Brains loving hardcore punks.  Basically they were a joke band.  ENJOYYYYYY old Nasty Beastie.  These songs come off their 1982 ep Pollywog Stew.   POLLYYWOGGS a.k.a. tadpoles. a.k.a. froggzzz

Transit Cop

Holly Snappers

Egg Raid on Mojo

I just want to be a portland yuppie


Is that too much to ask? i think not. All I want is to do is date this boy, have a cat or two, and listen to him serenade me with his ever so sincere and heartfelt voice while thoughtfully stroking his full mustache. It's not that hard, seriously. We could live in an apartment with those annoying "Free Tibet" flags that hang from every brownstone in Brooklyn Heights in our window, have a record player with an accompanying kick-ass collection of vinyl, New Yorkers strewn about the house, a group of bearded friends...

Yet, this man will not even make it easy to find a downloadable track of his. What a tease.

Sigh.

So, in the meantime while he gets on that, check out the meager collection of songs available on his myspace page, and you can fall in love too.
Please don't wreck me like you do.

Also, on June 9th, rush out and buy the new Portland Cello Project album, where among my man's, there are other insanely beautiful songs that are definitely worth shelling out the 15 or so bucks.

5.09.2009

Beautiful

This could be the best looking video ever



The Low Frequency In Stereo

Foxes getting married? WHATTTTT?!!!!


They are from Norway. They have a song called Texas Fox Honestly, what makes it a Texas Fox other than it being from Texas? I mean it probably looks like a Fox from California, or Oregon, or good old Idaho. Why not just call the song Universal Fox? Anyways, enjoy the Foxes and enjoy The Low Frequency In Stereo.

><(((((> -Fish!



5.05.2009

MY FIRST VIDEO

Pure Genius

My First Movie

This is a narrative I made last year of a spoiled puppy who busts out into the real world, only to discover she loves waffles and wants to come home. Featuring songs by Woody Guthrie, the Beastie Boys, The Beatles, and of course, Cat Stevens. It has been viewed 135 times on YouTube by my mother.

5.04.2009

Puppy Love/Tune In and Bro Out



I took this song straight from KEXP. Brakesbrakesbrakes play in NYC June 15th at the Mercury Lounge so go see 'em. This song is so appropriate for spring. Why don't you go do something cute and make your crush a mix tape and put this ditty on it? Really, why not? All you have to lose is nothing.

Passion Pit is wondrous. This is their new single and holy shmagoley, it is good. Calm jammy. They will be slugging all over NYC in the coming months.

Yo kid yo, listen to the radio show tonight at 8PM.

5.03.2009

Your smile is smothering me! :)


Great news: GANGSTER LEGS the radio show has NOT been canceled. I might be on social probation but that is a small price to pay for big time fun. 

So it's back to business for me.

Camera Obscura is a band from Glasgow and their newest release My Maudlin Career has received tidal waves of glistening reviews from both Pitchfork and me. 

I like this song: "Away with Murder"

And this song is so pretty. White Hinterland "Vessels"

KNUT

5.01.2009

I hate sand in between my toes.

Burning Man?

You're racing down the biggest hill you've ever seen on rollerblades? Yeah, yeah, kinda. You're in a room with 50 other people watching someone beat the shit out of a pinata with a glo-stick? Sorta. You've joined an underground fight club whose members are all extremely attractive and the sweat and blood gleams on their bodies during a fight under one lightbulb in a crowded basement and then Brad Pitt comes out from the shadows in a polyester shirt? Basically. You've just said fuck you to your parents, bolted out of the house and joined a motorcycle gang called The True Hearts? This motorcycle gang likes to fuck shit up and you've suddenly become their leader in shenanigans? YES. All these scenarios are basically the equivalent of listening to Nude Beach. Nude Beach is fun and energetic, and by fun and energetic I mean punk as fuck. And yeah, i mean, they're pretty fun too.

Check out their demo HERE and look out for an up coming world tour stretching all the way to Connecticut real soon.