This is why I will give birth: so it can mop my floor.

Using a baby as a mop is clever. Using M.O.P. as an outlet for persistent rage is savvy and safe.

TA RHYMES, TEPHLON AND REMY MARTIN - ANTE UP (REMIX)

M.O.P. - COLD AS ICE (EXPLICIT)

Download single

mista pista and pista sista

Everyone and everyone is into the Cults song "Go Outside." Not going to post it though because I am lazy and you can download the whole three song album here. It's catchy I will tell you that!

Here is a kind of Smiths-esque song but I like it. Just a group of svelte and attractive blonde boys. And a brunette I guess. The song is happy and sung by someone with an accent. This begs the question: is it real? The gang probably lives in Brooklyn and is watching About a Boy as you read this to perfect the dialect.

Bye Bye Bicycle - Sirens

Fixed bikes are on the way out! Rollerblading will soon experience a full-on revival second in popularity only to those sneakers with wheels on the bottom that were banned in schools. No brakes on a bike? Too safe. Sneakers without brakes? Impossibly cool and dangerous. Heads up: toss your ridiculous messenger bag that probably matches your frame and swap it all for a fanny pack, knee socks, and a personality. But in five months the sneaker trend will disappear and people will be really into driving their cars to get around so buy all this shit on eBay. This way your credit will stay pristine and you can get a loan for a Prius or Smart car. Smart cars are efficient for cozying into tricky parking spaces off of Bedford. Or just take your mom's Prius. She'll want to ride her fixie to work anyways. Straight handlebars with streamers!

when it's wet, you as nature protects these; And here's another nice walruses.

original version

This is a failure in my eyes which see straight through poorly executed remixes.

On the plus side here is a list of ways to survive.

Image, poem via.

just some inspirational technology

It is really awesome:



via (click right now to listen)

this dog is small/HUGE

This is a waste of time. I really hate this blog.

JUST KIDDING. I definitely hate it/everything but that doesn't mean it is a waste of your time. It is a waste of my time. Nonetheless I am selfless as can be. So many people have told me this blog brightened their days/saved their lives. I do it all for you.

Joanna Newsom used to sound like nails on a chalkboard to me. Fucking awful. Then Hank made me listen to a new song off of her new album by sneakily playing it on GANGSTER LEGS: The Radio Show. Fast one Hank. Go squirrel up the whole three-disker but here are some hors d'oeuvres. Each song is more like an epic main course. Have One On Me is 11 minutes long. They are good minutes. I like this it's really emotional.

Good Intentions Paving Company

Jackrabbits

'81

Have One On Me

New spoiler alert: This is a blog about stealing pictures from Cute Overload and shitty music you already know about. Keep reading!

Babeshow Boys

Time for some midweek boy band action!

The Dead Boys were a Cleveland punk boy band in the late 70s. QTs!
Dead Boys - Ain't It Fun
Dead Boys - Catholic Boy (Live at CBGB 1977)

The Beach Boys are a brainchild of the artist formerly known as Prince and they are touring nationally forever. Second song is a 1987 official collaboration with everyone's favorite Fat Boys.
The Beach Boys - Long Tall Texan
Fat Boys & The Beach Boys - Wipe Out

Mike D, whatcha got for me?
Beastie Boys - Finger Lickin' Good

Neon Boys: Earlier 70s. Richard Hell + Tom Verlaine + Billy Ficca. Super boy band! Also, they formed Television after this. Pretty good.
Neon Boys - Don't Die
Neon Boys - High Heeled Wheels

Thanks to Nick for the Neon Boys and Dead Boys! (Listen to his radio show to get up on the tunes, Thursdays 8-10 PM on East Village Radio. It's really great.)

Spring Break 2010: MIAMI HERE WE COME!

If you are going on a road trip for Spreak10 to Miami to engage in some raving, now might be the time to ask yourself--WHAT AM I GOING TO PUT ON MY MIXES FOR THE FUCKING RIDE DOWN TO GET IN THE MOOD? Well, after consulting some experts and receiving visions from god, I have the answer for you: You will play La Bouche's "Be My Lover." On repeat. I hope you live in Maine. Yes, the song has a bumping beat. It induces romantic vibes that will help you get a head start on seducing chosen car companions (don't wait until the dance floor when you might forget your roofies back in the suite). And yes, it even has a rhyme-spitting breakdown. But it isn't just a song unfairly molested by the film genre "comedy." Let's see.



You think you know what it means to be her lover? Whoa no. Men are hung from the ceiling of what appears to be the cargo of a semi-truck with their mouths duct taped shut driven by the singer--her eyes glazed over and her mind possessed with the lust for her cocooned prisoners. In order to get these driving shots and emotions to be realistic directors brought in a rabid hound and let it loose on the singer. (Note: I have consulted experts in the field of 1990s German and Australian Eurodance and they assert that the setting alternates between the back of a semi and a slaughterhouse.) It's either about male sex trafficking, veganism, or a simple PSA concerning rabies in humans. Enjoy your break, but if you don't get one because you are either pre-k or post grad I strongly advise you to head to Miami that week anyways. Bikinis, body shots, and bare-ass drunk kids falling off roofs: OH MY!

it's going to be visual

Photos from Rewards (Aaron Pfenning), other people performing officially/unofficially.

An intimate show.

SPEED SK8ING

After the Harlem show, which of course I did not see.

Check out that wall color! That color in the upper right--it's a great mint shade.

superiority complex

Daytrotter is a wayyyy better site than this shit is. Download:

Woods - Suffering Season, Death Rattles
Deer Tick - Dirty Dishes, These Old Shoes (craaazy version)
Avett Brothers - A Lover Like You, Paranoia in B Major
Wavves - Hula-Hoop

Do it yourself, lazy bones. Scour their sessions and download oh so many. Take over that bandwidth selfish selfish.

The Morning Benders have a new song, "Excuses." Go to their site for a free download. Here is a video of them playing it with a soccer team of people. The album Big Echo comes out March 9th on Rough Trade.