Buggin' Out!

I know its pretty much every girl's dream to have Robert Pattinson's Twilight character Edward Cullen in their bed feasting on their virgin blood. But what happens when he gets his whole family in on the feast? Most girls probably think, "Aw cool, I get a whole bunch of hot guys in my bed." WRONG. Don't forgot about those bitchy sisters. They're going to crush your self esteem with their size 2 bodies.

If you hate Twilight as much as I do imagine the Cullen's have decided to morph into inconsiderate little bugs that chomp your flesh at night. They don't really discriminate where they feast, which leaves mosquito like bites that itch like fuck. Considering they don't give a shit about you, they make their home in YOUR mattress, and thinks its cool to shit all over YOUR bed. Personally, at this point I'd rather take Robert Pattinson and his whole crew pounding me in the ass nightly.

If you haven't guessed by now, I am living with fucking bed bugs! What makes matters so much more awesome is that I just moved and now am paying out the ass to get rid of them.

So I just decided to throw in a Fake Blood song that you can enjoy while you think of tiny insects living in your mattress/headboard/floors/clothing/toothpaste/bag of weed/turkey sandwiches. So while your feeling like Cohaagen did in the picture above, you better get your ass to Mars. Fake Blood did!