SUPER HAWT BLOG TIME

I don't know where it came from, but the word "awesome" needs to leave my vocabulary. I am not that awesome, and seriously most of us aren't because that word is reserved for Jesus, not yourself (you selfish bastard). Did you get super ridiculous headaches and develop a split personality that can speak to God? No? That's right because you're not that fucking awesome, so stop using it interchangeably with your state of being.

You know what is awesome? Real life. What is real life, you ask? It's downing a bottle of sleeping pills with rubbing alcohol while enjoying a pack of menthol cigarettes. It's buying a gun with its serial number defaced, and then using it on your parents because they owe you protection money. It's getting punched in the face with a paternity suit over that love child your mother bore for you. It's ripping your sexual organs off in a fit of rage over the last episode of Gossip Girl. It's crossing the street only to get hit by a steaming pile of human excrement, immediately followed by a bus. It's living in Florida. Actually, check that. Living in Florida is far from real life, and more closely resembles treating a yeast infection with hot sauce.

All things considered, I have come to the conclusion that my life could use a reality check. I guess I should have seen The Swiss a few months ago, but missed them because, as I stated previously, I am not that awesome. The Swiss are a disco band of sorts, and hopefully they will come back so I can bestow upon them my wisdom regarding what is real life. Here is a video of them performing at the show I missed. UGH! SUICIDE!

Also, here's a sick jam by them called Bubble Bath...