I got tickets to Iron Maiden baby.

Before someone else thinks of this I want to copyright my idea. Have you heard of Bros Icing Bros? It's a drinking game that goes like this, but I don't actually know the rules but this is it: you always have to have a Smirnoff Ice on you at all times. If a bro comes up to you and tries to ice you but you are without a Smirnoff you have to drink theirs in one gulp. If someone tries to ice you and you too have a Smirnoff that asshole has to drink both. Risky! Finally boys came up with a way to legitimize their love of Smirnoff.

But all good viral campaigns have spin offs and so I came up with "Bitches Tea-bagging Bitches." (© 2010 Emily) All bitches must carry thermoses of Long Island Iced Tea. But wouldn't bitches be able to see other bitches thermoses and cheat? I have that figured out too. Late 19th century hoop skirts and bustles. If one bitch tries to tea bag another bitch who doesn't have her tea properly concealed in the holster under her bustle she will be vomiting everywhere in 10 minutes and the only redemption will be that she has helped to bring back a style long overdue for a revival--keep your fingers crossed for the corset's second coming. BTB is has higher stakes than BIB because bitches don't fuck around with Smirnoff. That shit is for dudes now. Good luck getting an interview with me, New York Times. E-mail is best.

It comes right down to athleticism. The World Cup, hoops, ping pong. Everything. There's a little kid and a 25 year old skating outside my window. Sports and friendship. Check out this sweet song's accompanying video!

Wet Illustrated - Born Stokes



HAPPY SUMMER! IT IS SUMMER! TIME 2 PARTY 24/7 AFTER WORK!