I love my new toothbrush! Thanks Mom and Dad!

SHARKS

Here are some things I love:

1. Milk...Love it.

2. Little plastic dinosaurs...Love them so much.

3. The perfect pen...Love the endless quest.

4. Putting sriracha on everything I eat. I love it!

So clearly I am not incapable of love, after all. If I can love milk, I'm sure I can love other things, like people. 

Download "Have Love Will Travel" The Black Keys (Really fun band that sounds like grinding up glass and dirt in a blender. I am trying to tell you they have a sort of gritty sound but its dope as can be!

Download "Modern Love" David Bowie (DUH man.)

Download "I'll Believe in Anything" Wolf Parade (Perhaps the greatest band of the millennium. you don't need to listen to the next 1,000 of music that will come. This. Is. It. 

Download "La La Love You" Pixies (Double DUH (duh) man.)

Download "Skinny Love" Bon Iver (Want to feel like you are standing in a white room filled to the top with down feathers and there is beautiful light streaming down through the feathers and you feel very warm and safe? Sometimes I get that craving, so I listen to Bon Iver.)

TRAINSSSSSS

I love trains. Alot. I grew up within earshot of trains since babyhood and I still can hear trains passing in the middle of the night where I live now if my window is open a crack and I listen hard. I feel like this means something deep and significant, but I can't figure out what just yet. I love their horns especially, warning misguided deer off the tracks. Or at least that's what I'd like to think they're howling for. Either that or for the pure pleasure of the conductor. Either option is disgustingly poetic. If I were a conductor of a train, that shit'd be going off all night. I probably won't become a conductor, but I do hope to go across the country on a train at some point. I think that's what one would call a "life-shaping experience." Well, they would if they read Kerouac and didn't bathe alot probably, or something like that. Because I love trains so much, I guess it's pretty inherent that I love railcars too. railcars (lowercase intentional) is great. They are great basement dance/trash party music. They are also great music for alerting deer in danger consequently.

Download Bohemia is Without A Sea, Through the Trees Lay Smokestacks, and There is Ice It Is Blue.

Do you know this guy?

I might have just found your (new?) favorite rapper. He's actually not new at all. In fact, he's been around, being badass, for longer than any of my younger cousins have been alive. He's a West coast rapper though, and this East coast interior-decorating-loving white girl is simply behind the times. Sigh.

Download Andre Nickatina Ate Miles From the City of Dope, Blood N My Hair, and Nasty Like College Chicks.

Forest + Water

I saw two really great bands the other night. And I use the word "saw" very loosely because the venue was so smokey and fogged up with the smell of broken beer bottles and young hormones that I couldn't really see more than three feet in front of me. However, I guess I was there to hear not see anyways, so things worked out because in terms of listening, I received quite the treat. Wavves played a banging set that made everyone literally bounce in place, some even attempting to create a light-hearted mosh pit. They were super. Then, after their wonderful set, a band I really really love, Woods, set up. This might be silly sounding, but I feel like Woods doesn't make music, they create it (if such a distinction can be made). They wrestle out notes and sounds and yelps from their instruments and crazy elaborate soundboard in such a way that you feel like you're suddenly the lead character in a very dark and serious foreign film. I don't exactly know what that means, but take it for what you will. Also, it's really fun watching that guy on stage with the headphones thrash around and try not to get his many cords caught or tangled while doing so. LOVE IT.

Download Wavves: Teenage Super Party, Gun in the Sun, and So Bored.

Download Woods: Spike, Family, and Diamond Days.

Catch both Woods and Wavves tonight, if you haul ass, at the Market Hotel. They also play tomorrow night at "Less Artists More Condos." Check it out if you know what's good for you.

Mail this, Cupid.

I have gotten heart stamps the last two times I have been to the post office. It is embarrassing to send a letter to someone who now thinks you have hidden feelings for them and are trying to communicate it not through the letter itself but through the postage. Above is the exact stamp given to me by the lady behind the post office counter. These are the kind of stamps Cupid uses when overnighting his arrows into people's hearts. These are not the kind of stamps that I want to use. I need some bourgeoisie-friendly art stamps, or maybe one's that promote the rights of kittens. But puffy cartoon hearts? I can only hope the little man running under the weight of that fat ass heart is getting ready to punt it off a cliff. KABOOM. Alas: The United States Postal Service says: "Entitled "All Heart," the design focuses on a large, bright red heart that is transporting its owner to an unseen beloved who will be gifted with this heart full of love." If that isn't the scariest shit you have ever heard then you must be down with having organs other than your brain control your actions. What?

Download "Love Song 2009" Dent May- This song is really cute and he has quite a falsetto. 

Download "Love Story" Deltron- This is not cute. Deltron will never rap in a falsetto. 

Download "Lover's Leap" Bela Fleck & The Flecktones- Despite the name, the song does not make me want to leap off a bridge. Bela Fleck is amazing. This song is instrumental (some lofty vocals in there too). 

Download "The Red Telephone" Love- This song is by a band called Love. I love this band. "I feel real phony when my name is Phil." And I do, too. This song reminds me of my dorm in high school. Awesome!

Okay, fine, you win...sorta.

Love isn't all bad. I mean, if something like this video can come out of it and instantly uplift me from indefinitely shitty mood to hugging everyone within five feet and reciting Shakespeare, then i guess love can be kinda cool. Thanks Zach Condon for keeping the dream alive.

This video is outrageously good. Use it as your secret weapon.

Ps- If you are one of the lucky ones seeing Beirut and (the motherfucking!!) Tune-Yards tomorrow in Brooklyn, congratulations: I am extremely jealous.

Don't worry

In an effort to try and balance out this attempt at love, this following post/song is meant to make you, fellow poster, and you the internet at large, feel better about not being in love. And to show you that love poems are actually terrible when written about you. No seriously. They're collegiate, and embarrassing, and menial. Congrats lover, you know how to use metaphor. Wow, you're comparing our love to a river? That's cool. Oh, yeah, I guess my hair is pretty shiny and blonde in the sun, thanks. You got me there.

Download Sex Beat by Gun Club because though they are mad sexy, they know what's up; ain't nobody foolin' them.

Also download You're Dumb By the Black Lips. The Black Lips often make it into my coveted "favorite band" status every few weeks or so. I plan on doing a future post at some point fully expressing my love for them. But for now, I'll stick to why they are relevant to this post: they make me want to smash empty beer bottles over the heads of cute boys and then beat them up. This is pretty much what happens at every Black Lips show, plus or minus a little smooching.

Dance Dance Lovelution

All I know is that no one has ever written me a love poem, love song, or declared their undying love for me. I don't have leprosy, yet, so what the fuck? I understand that some of my interests may not align with anyone else's. I really like chapstick, bird watching, and my dog. I like to research things like how pencils and cheese are made. I also like being alone. All the time. I don't understand why this should get in the way of my being in a successful relationship. We can be alone together, just not in the same general area. 

Also, I always have my headphones on. I just don't want to talk to you, probably. You know what? A lot of the time there isn't even music playing. I keep them on only to deter potential advances from conversationalists. Unfortunately, I think I am going to have to talk to someone if I am going to make any friends. 

In the last few days of my research have begun to discover a few things. 

1) I think you have to have been in love to write about it, musically or otherwise.

2) I think you have to have been in love to appreciate love, musically interpreted or otherwise.

3) This whole project is turning my stomach. 

4) But I shall perservere. 

Here are some dance-y dance love songs.

Download "Easy Love" MSTRKRFT

Download "Universal Love" DL Incognito

Download "Spread" Outkast

These songs are all amazing. They will probably not induce pheromone-like love potion effects. But they will make you get up and shake that thang. Yeah, you will.